Questions for Ben: What you can do to prevent the breakdown of society (plus chickens)

How could you not give this man a lousy dollar?
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Today I ask the author, comedian, poet, and all-round hilarious dude, Ben Pobjie, some questions (mainly about chickens). A big thank you to Ben for agreeing to let me loose in his brain.

Frog: You've started your latest show, An Evening of Unfettered Ben, at the Butterfly Club in Melbourne this week. The crucial question is; will there be butterflies?

Ben: No. I've been thoroughly fumigated.

Frog: OK folks, you heard it here first. You can all go to the show (you're all going, right?) knowing you won't be bothered by any pesky Lemon Migrants or Purple Coppers. Ben, you're currently raising money for your next MICF show - Trigger Warning. What can you tell us about the show?

Ben: It will be completely unapologetic, potentially disturbing and reasonably audible. Do not come if you are likely to be offended by anything whatsoever.

Frog: Chicken, or beef?

Ben: Chicken. C'mon. Beef? It's known as "poor man's chicken".

Frog: Why did the chicken?

Ben: Pure bloody-mindedness.

Frog: Speaking of chickens, you're funding your next MICF show with the Give Ben A Dollar campaign. How's that going?

Ben: People have been very generous except for those who haven't. I ask you: if I asked you for a dollar to buy a packet of chips, wouldn't you give it to me? So c'mon guys, why not to buy a packet of comedy?

Frog: Well then I ask you, if I gave you a dollar today, what would you do with it?

Ben: Flip it in the air in a rakish manner.

Frog: I'd pay to see that. On the subject of rakes, Tennant or Smith?

Ben: Tennant. Unless the Smith in question is champion Melbourne Storm hooker Cameron Smith, who is pretty great.

Frog: What's the best heckle (not written by you) that you've ever received at a gig?

Ben: This is like asking me who is my favourite racist. The best heckle is one that a person is intelligent enough to keep to themselves. 

Frog: Let's talk about favourites, then. House Stark, or House Lannister?

Ben: To be friends with, or to stab an innocent person in the face? Stark for the former. Stark again for the latter, since you couldn't even trust a Lannister to stab the right person.

Frog: If you could invite anyone (living, dead, real, or fictional) over for dinner, who would it be and why (I'm guessing neither Starks nor Lannisters are on the list)?
Ben: Shaun Micallef. I would beg him for a job. 

Frog: While you're waiting for Shaun Micallef to drop from the ceiling with a job, what's the most persuasive reason you can think of why people should Give Ben a Dollar?

Ben: Because human society is built on the principle of reciprocal cooperation, and those who fail to assist their fellow man in his time of need are risking a total breakdown of the community adhesion upon which civilisation depends.

Frog: Shit, this comedy thing is serious. C'mon people, Give Ben a Dollar. We don't want to see civilisation fall for the lack of a little gold coin, do we?

Ben Pobjie writes for The Guardian, The Age, New Matilda and for his own blog, Ben Pobjie's Wonderful World of Objects. You should all go like him on Facebook and follow him on Twitter, and go see him at the Butterfly Club. Most of all, though, you should give him a dollar. For the sake of humanity.

How Seal Ate His Own Children - Ben Pobjie's Let's Put on a Show gives me an asthma attack

Image by Ben Pobjie - FUNNY DUDE

Last night I went to a gig and was reminded how old I was because I swear foetuses were ordering drinks at the bar.

Then I laughed until my lungs exploded.

Ben Pobjie’s “Let’s Put on a Show” was so damn funny that I was reaching for my Ventolin after only ten minutes. This takes some doing, since I’m a humourist of sorts myself and I consider myself a bit of a veteran when it comes to the whole laughing thing. I do it a lot.

Little did I know. I AM AN AMATEUR.

“Let’s Put on a Show” is hilariously mental. Completely different each night, Ben launches the theme for each show based on the random craziness generated from members of the audience.

Last night’s audience was pretty high on the Mental-O-Meter.

The show started with Delta Goodrem’s Neo-Nazi robot indoor cricket team having a holiday at the beach while Delta herself was pregnant to Seal.

Hard to believe, I know, but it got weirder from there.

Brilliant, random crazy humour was interspersed with white-hot social and political comment as the story of “How Seal Ate His Own Children” gambolled through a huge range of hilarious subjects before coming to its insane conclusion. Ben educated us about sex, something the audience appeared to know nothing about (although we had an unnaturally detailed knowledge of nature, apparently). Thanks for not putting your elbow in my mouth, Ben. I appreciate it.

We discovered that Delta is a mammal who lays eggs* and that Seal is half seal. Explains a lot really.

I could explain more about the show but frankly SPOILERS SWEETY and you should all just go and see it for yourselves. You won’t regret it.

“Let’s Put on a Show” is part of the Melbourne International Comedy Festival and runs until 14 April. You can book here.

Take your asthma meds with you.

A ridiculously cheap night of jaw-aching hilarity.

A truly educational show.

7.384 stars.

Delightfully mental.

Just go fucking see it, OK?

* Ben I think this makes her a monotreme. I know. I need to get out more. And sorry about my craptacular timekeeping skillz.